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Poetry by brookiet77

Written stuff by NeahCross

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Submitted on
November 20, 2012
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You Left Me Stronger:

Hey there, it's been awhile, do you remember me?

I guess you might not, since I wasn't very important to you.

You know, I spent so many days thinking about - what I did wrong

I questioned if maybe, I was at fault or if I was screwed up.

I thought a lot about the things you said...

The things that were my fault, my problems.

I took them to heart at first, but then I realised you were wrong.

I realised that you are selfish and ugly on the inside.

On the surface you pretended to care, but like a cancer;

You amputate someone the moment you think they've gone bad.

You hide from the rigours of life and only emerge like a parasite

When everything is good - when everything is fine and dandy.

I used to think that I was afraid of you leaving,

But now I know, that you've left me stronger than I was before.

You know, this was supposed to be an emotional whine; an emotional spill,

Maybe I was supposed to cry tears and beg you to come back, but you know what

I just don't need you anymore.

-Chen Yuan Wen, 20th November 2012
Don't forget to drop a fave if you liked my work, it helps it rank for popularity and I consider it an honour to receive one ^^

If you'd like to hear me do some live comedy, answer questions and read poems LIVE then check out episode 4 of my live show here: [link]

Author's Comment:

Alright mates, I actually tried to do an emotional poem fer you guys, but unfortunately it turned into a rather urban sort of slam poem.

So when reading, try it with a strong street/urban accent and I think it will sound a lot better.

Other than that, I hope you enjoyed it and I'll be clearing messages slowly. This will be one of the poems I'll be reading out during my comeback episode of Word of Chen Live tomorrow.

As for the idea behind it, well...I wanted to explore the issue of someone feeling stronger after emotional trauma or a break up, as opposed to feeling broken and helpless. There are plenty of romance/emotional poems that talk about how sad they feel afterward, but of course there's always the recovery rather than the downward spiral. Hence, this was a take on the recovery where you realise that, the simply weren't the right one for you and of course you move on from that ^^

Thankfully, this has nothing to do with my personal life, else I'd probably be extremely weepy and sad if my current girlfriend left me :/ and you'll see teenage level poems for a few days haha xD

Enjoy mates :3 Captain Chen out ;3

-Captain Chenbeard o' th' Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:

P.S. Trying out an Australian Pirate accent...sort of xD

Other Poems by Me:
Machine ManMachine Man:

It began with but a simple command, "to do as we are told".

Never to deviate from this path - never to nurture the soul.

We are told that we are given a purpose; "a part of something great!"

Yet why oh why am I so weary of that which is my fate?

Am I an error, a single anomaly, unable to feel intact?

Or am I missing some special attribute - a facet which I lack.

In a society made of fleshed machines; robots wearing skin,

Perhaps I'm simply seeking something, to fill this metal tin.

-Chen Yuan Wen, 16th November 2012
They Watch UsThey Watch Us:

Perched high upon the mountains;
With wings as black as night.
They watch us in the hour,
Before darkness turns to light.

I've seen them in my visions;
In dreams they come and go,
But the things they seem to tell me
I guess nobody should know...

I've seen children that are buried,
Beneath a frozen lake.
A maiden sits there weeping;
Her heart is soon to break.

The crows flutter downward,
A noose amongst their hands.
They take the maiden away,
To a dark and distant land.

And even if I follow -
Even if I try...
I'll simply end up buried,
Where the frozen children lie.

-Chen Yuan Wen, 10th November 2012
Sensual TortureSensual Torture:

You are but a simple pawn;
Caught in a maelstrom of ill feelings and turmoil.
You were not meant to be here -
But unfortunately, here you are my friend...

Now then, I do not wish to drag this out;
There is no purpose in badgering someone who knows so little.
However - without your confession - I'm afraid that
I would not know whom I should share my - pleasures with...

Though I'm certain that you will be sharing plenty...

Of course, it will probably be a poor idea to make you scream,
At least not while I'm still enjoying your fear.
Instead we'll begin with a simple agony;
A quick taste of your pain to whet my appe
An Oath to My FatherAn Oath to My Father:

The chill of winter is nothing, when compared to the cold inside my heart.

A fire, once stoked by the warmth of family, has quietly died, five falls past.

I dream of my father, who watches from beyond the realms - and my ancestors

Who fought against an endless army of giants, to win the lands we have today.

Just as a devout man honours his God through worship, I honour them through my axe!

Each stroke of the whetstone, each screech of the metal, brings me closer to them -

Even as I draw closer to my doom. Oh how I can feel him, for the anger in my blood

Boils evermore as I sense him approaching my camp. He is hun

Other Literature by Me:
Mercenary 1-1MERCENARY

Chapter 1: Blood is Beauty

Release One: Pages 1 - 3

THE COLD AIR in Baron Rorke's study did little to calm his nerves. He was expecting visitors this night and they were not the best of company. A shiver of dread ran down his spine and he spent most of the twilight hours staring out of a large window which stood behind his writing desk. It was amazing, he felt, how quickly a man could become attached to a life of luxury; only to be made painfully aware of how easy it was to lose it. War was always a frightening thing, even more so when one had the knowledge and sense to realise that it was no longer an exercise of glory, but a si
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Something everyone has gone through, and something I think everyone should go through: a tough relationship-- or furthermore, a tough breakup.
It's painful, but ultimately I find you learn the most from a relationship once it's over. It's a learning experience and a token of wisdom. You're feeling a very reasonable way and expressing it. Your poem is and doesn't condescend.

However, I personally think your poem could use some individuality. I feel like it's lost in basics and clumsy metaphors.
I can definitely feel this is running on raw emotion; a lot of hurt and anger and self-righteousness. You state that you have found yourself and now stand on your own two feet, but I remain unconvinced as a reader.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
15 out of 21 deviants thought this was fair.

First off, I would just like to tell you how much I love this type of poem, so if the rest of this is horribly biased, that's why.
The beginning of the poem gives a good sense of slight confusion and it sounds like the speaker is almost incredulous. It move into a more sarcastic tone towards the middle before jumping straight to the heart of the problem, the cancerous parasite. You use great descriptive words to show just how messed up and hypocritical this person is. I really like the end especially because you go back to focusing on the speaker and his thoughts. The last two lines in particular are excellent. The biting, harsh reality of the last line is very final and a fitting way to end the poem and any last vestiges of attachment that may have lingered on either side of the relationship. Very vivid overall.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
30 out of 31 deviants thought this was fair.

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SapphireAmber Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2013   Photographer
I love this poem, it's excactly how I feel right now, your words have made me think about it and you're right. The feeling you have when someone who said he loves you and he doens't mean a word of it, is terrible. But after a while, you figure out that you have really learnt something from it, you are stronger. And nothing will tear you down.
Respect from the Netherlands.
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank you for enjoying this piece my dear friend ^^

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
SplitNinja Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Going back to your younger years, Sencho?xD
JE-S2 Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I saw this as an example when submitting a poem and searched it straight after! It's sooo good :D
noorelven Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012
Well said
EgoSlayer Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2012
The last line being in bold really does wonders, it makes the whole thing hit like a truck. Very powerful, I love it.
mylastel Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2012
It makes me cry. :iconcryforeverplz: It happened to me before, and now it's happening to me again. I kept thinking what's wrong with me and why I felt unimportant all of a sudden to this particular person. :tears:
Silversahde Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
I actually started to cry when I read this, because I know how it feels. I constantly feel this way with my relationship, or lack of, with my father. He did something recently, that once again makes me wonder if I should even bother trying to have a relationship with him because he hardly does anything to even try to have a relationship with me. He blames it on me, when he's the one who does nothing to try and fix it.

Thank you for this poem and all the other wonderful ones you have written.
Goldenboy91 Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
i relate to this...some recent stuff going on and this poem tells exactly how i'm felling: "Maybe I was supposed to cry tears and beg you to come back, but you know what

I just don't need you anymore."

nuff said! feeling much stronger :]

great job touching my soul
blueskywatcher Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2012   General Artist
Very lovely poem! It's amazing how well it fits with what I'm going through right now. Well done! You basically put the last few months of my life together in this poem. I will deffinately share this with my friends!
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