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September 28, 2012
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Why I Hate My Life:

Despite the fact that I'm a trained professional
I have to work odd-jobs making deliveries on a motorcycle

The only girl who I ever loved
was just using me as a replacement

The only girl that actually likes me
runs a bar and took over my house

I don't have the guts to kick her out
so I end up sleeping at an abandoned church

I've recently picked up a strange rash
it hurts and I have to wear sleeves to cover it

My only friends are a guy that never comes out from a forest
and a girl that's always looking to steal the meager possessions I have

Everything sucks really
because the one person who cared about me
is already dead...

He was my army buddy, always cool, always the best
I visit his grave sometimes, in the middle of long deliveries

The worst part about everything though
is the fact that the one guy who made my life hell
The one guy who took everything important away from me
just came back to town a few minutes ago...

And you know what he said the moment our eyes met?
"It's been awhile, Cloud..."


-Chen Yuan Wen, 28th September 2012
If you lol'd or facepalmed, don't forget to fave it ^^

If you'd like to hear my reading style, please check out the first episode of WordofChen Live here: [link]

Author's Comment:

Alright soooo by now you probably figured that this is a joke poem xD

One of the reasons I wanted to do this, is because I keep seeing reposts of stories like 'My Life Sucks' etc. It usually is a written description of spongebob's life and at the end they usually go: "The worst part is that I live in a pineapple under the sea."

After seeing those sorts of stories, I wanted to lighten the mood and try a story like this based on Cloud from FF7. Hopefully it puts things in perspective for everyone else that says their life sucks.

Looking at it from an outside perspective though, Cloud's life really did suck, he ends up as a delivery boy despite saving the world and is so Beta that he can't even hit on Tifa who already likes him a lot. It's like...using a reverse friendzone. She's trying to pull him into the boyfriend zone and he's all 'Naaaaah brah, I'm too emo, I'll go cry at Zack's tomb again'. Seriously Cloud, give Tifa's 'materia' a try, you'll probably enjoy it, unless VincentxCloud is the truth *___*

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:

Other Poems by Me:
My Beautiful Filth My Beautiful Filth:

We'll start with the rose petals
scattered lavishly across the bed
A symbolic collage of my broken thoughts
like memories crushed and thrown into the winds
they lie where they fall, forever forgotten...

Tacks and nails shall line the floor!
A perfect representation of my painful steps
To walk forward was to suffer
to stand still was to endure
Like the insults thrown at me, like the physical abuse
they drive their way into my skin and remain embedded
Unable to be removed except by force

And now comes the masterpiece, the perfect finishing touch
A wall of words and photographs depicting my sorrows and greivance
Whispering to Lucifer Whispering to Lucifer:

Humans are such wonderous creatures
even when granted the gift of knowledge
They fall prey to their own insecurities
slaves to their own fears and paranoia

Such is the father's gift of free will...

Yes my lord, I understand
but do you not feel disappointment?
The great bringer of light has condemned himself to an eternity of darkness
simply so his father's children may roam free

Without adversity, there can be no acension...

Ah, such a philosophical statement from you
I am well aware that humans must experience both extremes
Without tasting joy it would be impossible to understand sorrow
Yet I fear that my
Letting Go of You Letting Go of You:

You abandoned me in the past
without so much as a proper goodbye
One day you simply chose to walk out the door
and you never did come back...

I was angry then, hurting badly
I wondered if I was in some way inadequate
I wondered if you left because I am so easy to despise
and eventually my sorrow turned to anger

I wanted to become great
to show you that you made the wrong choice
to take my strength and throw it in your face
just so you would regret it

But then I saw how happy you were...

In the time we've been apart
You've made a new life for yourself
You've found someone who loves and treasures you
and upon
This is All About You This Is All About You:

Most people giving you advice, might take a quote from a book

Most people giving you advice, have never had a real look

So from someone who's been watching, let me lay my heart bare

I want to show you all the special things, about the girl for whom I care

She always does her very best, no matter how tough the task

Even when she's struggling, she puts on a brave mask

She's always trying to learn new things, just for a chance to make you proud

She can be a little bit quiet, but I think that's better than being loud

She's not the very best in sports, I know she can be kind of a klutz

But she smiles and goes on an


Other Literature by Me:
Mercenary 1-1 MERCENARY

Chapter 1: Blood is Beauty

Release One: Pages 1 - 3

THE COLD AIR in Baron Rorke's study did little to calm his nerves. He was expecting visitors this night and they were not the best of company. A shiver of dread ran down his spine and he spent most of the twilight hours staring out of a large window which stood behind his writing desk. It was amazing, he felt, how quickly a man could become attached to a life of luxury; only to be made painfully aware of how easy it was to lose it. War was always a frightening thing, even more so when one had the knowledge and sense to realise that it was no longer an exercise of glory, but a si
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:iconprestosauce:
prestosauce Featured By Owner Nov 16, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I don't know what I was expecting...
XD Goddammit, I fell for that...
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:iconsonamydbz:
sonamydbz Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
I feel you ........
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:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2013  Professional Writer
Glad for the feel :3

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
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:iconeonlie:
Eonlie Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013
I am so glad I thought of FF7 before I got to the end XD This is really good though. It starts out sad, but when you realize that it's actually a joke, you can't help but giggle ^^
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Professional Writer
Bwahaha, thank you for enjoying it. Hopefully you enjoy my new works coming out soon ^^

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
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:iconeonlie:
Eonlie Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013
I def will <3 Sarah and I can't wait until we see your new work ^^

Oh, and in case you haven't noticed, though I'm sure it's quite obvious, my name is Simone ^^ I liked your page recently XD Not a smart thing to do, have Sarah and I on the same page...
You poor, poor man :(
Sorry in advance!

{Sarah's next to me agreeing and laughing XD}
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:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Professional Writer
Ooooo so you're the two, please comment more, I love engaging in conversation ^^

When I'm not busy as all hell :3 xD (I still totally haven't replied to your notes ad I need to do that soon)

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconeonlie:
Eonlie Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2013
*flail*
Yeah XD
Really though, we can be a bit much, so if we're ever overwhelming, just tell us :T

Haha, I totally get that ^^ It's no worries dear!
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:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2013  Professional Writer
Nah its cool :3 New idea on Facebook, let me know what you two think rofl.

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
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:iconperianth5:
Perianth5 Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2012  Student General Artist
You put this guy through hell....... LOVE IT!!! :meow: :clap: :happybounce:
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