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Written Art by sandramonster

Poetry by brookiet77

Literature by RisenAnarchy

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Submitted on
October 26, 2012
File Size
1.2 KB
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880 (who?)
There Are Things Beneath the Garden:


There are things beneath the garden,
Which you really shouldn't see.

There are things beneath the garden,
That don't belong to me.

There are things beneath the garden,
Gone rotten blue and black.

There are things beneath the garden,
In a dripping gunny sack...


There are flowers in the garden,
Which you really shouldn't pull.

There are flowers in the garden,
That sit on top of wool.

There are flowers in the garden,
With a really rotten scent.

There are flowers in the garden,
Above bodies burnt and bent...


I love this little garden,
It's a special place to me.

I love this little garden,
It's where I want to be.

I love this little garden,
Now wouldn't you like to see?

I love this little garden;
And you'll be number three...

-Chen Yuan Wen, 26th October 2012
Please take a moment to fave my work, it adds to my popularity ranking and really let's me know you've enjoyed my work ^^

If you'd like to hear me read poems and do a little comedy live then then check out episode 3 of my live show here: [link]

Author's Comment:

Arrr maties,

So t'night I decided t' post a slightly twisted horror piece written in the style of a children's rhyme.

Now most o' me more recent watchers may not know this but me earliest works were mostly dark and that is what really helped me t' get my popularity in the early days. Now, havin' worked on urban and more emotional pieces, I'd like t' revisit me old roots in darkness. ESPECIALLY, with Halloween drawin' close.

If ye enjoyed me poetry, don't forget t' share, fave or comment. Any and all of those three are important...because I want t' spread th' Word o' Chen *___*

-Captain Chenbeard o' th' Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:

Other Poems by Me:

He stands before the adoring crowd,
Basking in their cheers and standing ovation.
But he has already been dishonoured -
By means of his perverse innovation.

For none could know of the dark secret;
About the art that he claims to be his own.
It is naught but an illusion, smoke and mirrors -
A theft for which he must atone...

But this disgusting creature, this worthless abhuman;
So desperate for the glory which he sees upon the stage!
Will quietly don the skin of another;
An urge he must assuage...

Biting his nails, a cracked smile upon his lips, he whispers:
"No one will know, no one will find it and I am great..."

Coward of a ManCoward of a Man:

You stand there whinin', cryin' crocodile tears and playin' victim.
Ye eyes demand pity, but yer lips are spewin' nothin' but lies.
Flowery speeches o' harmony and unification;
It's bollocks and snake-oil I say!

I ask ye, as someone who aspires t' be a leader:
What exactly are ye worth?
Who exactly are ya, and what in th' bloody hell makes you worth followin'?

Now I've watched ye fer a long time, and I've known ye fer even longer -
Ye always stand there beggin', askin' us fer help, askin' fer a handout;
But yer hands are clean, uncalloused, and completely free from sweat or toil.
Instead, ye make us promises; promi
Little Soldier BoyHe does not fight for the General barking orders,

Nor for the man in a suit, who sent him across borders...

In his pocket he keeps a single picture, a sole reminder

Like ancient scripture. A home he misses so endlessly,

Tirelessly calling out in his dreams at night. It is the last

That remains on his lips, with his finger pressed upon the trigger.

A single heartbeat, as he sights his enemy; A quiet prayer

To rest in peace. Yet soon it fades, as hope is fleeting;

For the little soldier boy, once marching home.

 "Bottoms up buddy, I miss you..."

-Chen Yuan Wen, 18th October 2012
I Comfort MyselfWith a warm drink, whispering secrets to my own reflection.

The struggles that plague me, though none may know,

Are only for the ears of my quiet mirror, who smiles

Softly, warmly and with care. He tells me, I'm fine

I've done well for now and soon I may finally rest.

Though the silence continues to press upon me,

Weighing upon my soul like an iron crate.

Still I find comfort in whispering secrets,

If only to my own reflection - holding a warm drink...

-Chen Yuan Wen, 17th October 2012

Other Literature by Me:
Mercenary 1-1MERCENARY

Chapter 1: Blood is Beauty

Release One: Pages 1 - 3

THE COLD AIR in Baron Rorke's study did little to calm his nerves. He was expecting visitors this night and they were not the best of company. A shiver of dread ran down his spine and he spent most of the twilight hours staring out of a large window which stood behind his writing desk. It was amazing, he felt, how quickly a man could become attached to a life of luxury; only to be made painfully aware of how easy it was to lose it. War was always a frightening thing, even more so when one had the knowledge and sense to realise that it was no longer an exercise of glory, but a si
Add a Comment:
I like the imagery and the creepyness of it, but the whole thing lost it's magic to me with the rhythm. The rhyme scheme works, but the rhythm and metre don't seem to be working all the time. I can see the trochees can be found in most of the lines and probably that's the rhythm you wished to use (trochee goes stressed-unstressed), but in some lines they turn into iambs, which distorts the peaceful readability. Also, you didn't stick to the 7 syllables in the lines, sometimes it's 6, other times it's 8, and it kind of destroys the rhymes when the rhyming word fails to come at time or comes early.
I really like the concept, like a Lovecraft story in a poem, it's really creative, nice pictures, nice use of turns in the last lines. The rhymes work perfectly. The only problem is that you should follow a metre of your choice, that's a basic in English poetry, or the whole thing falls apart when read out. :)
Practise more, you're on the right track! Good job. :)
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
23 out of 27 deviants thought this was fair.

This is a very nice poem. Your vision was very clear; the story paced itself very well, the turn around at the end was very effective and well foreshadowed. Particularly, putting it in three parts was a very good choice - not too many, not too few.

It was very original, I'm just quite anal when it comes to originality stars so unless I come across something that I have never or barely ever heard of before I won't give all. I thought that you used the 'creepy nursery rhyme' style well, though.

Technique. Well, your technique is quite good, but I find that the same problem crops up in pretty much all of your rhyming poems and it's particularly evident since it's in a children's style. I think that your perfect rhymes are great and the repetition was well put - however, I kept on being distracted by your flawed, or lack of, metre. Something that I go to great pains to make sure is always correct in my own work is the rhythm. If you have a consistent rhythm, sometimes it doesn't even matter how many syllables are in each line. Some common ones are:

stress/unstress/stress/unstress etc. or
unstress/stress/unstress/stress etc. or a mixture of the two.

Also, I thought that There are flowers in the garden/That are sitting on top of wool was a little bit of a forced rhyme.

Overall I really liked the poem and thought it was fantastic. The story was great and well paced. However, because of the inconsistent rhythm, the impact wasn't as great as it could have been.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
13 out of 13 deviants thought this was fair.

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Uchiharthur Featured By Owner Apr 9, 2014  Student Writer
I love it how it looked so innocent in the beggining and in the end it was the smoothest impact ever!
WordOfChen Featured By Owner May 13, 2014  Professional Writer
Haha, thank you kindly :'3

-Chenbeard the Pirate :iconwordofchen:
Hawkheart29 Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
O.O Woah...
DecomposedRosie Featured By Owner Jul 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Sir, this was one of the best poems that I've read in here! I loved its whole nature and the atmosphere you've created, along with the ending, was absolutely amazing :clap:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank ye fer enjoyin' me works lass ^^

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
DecomposedRosie Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
No probs, just stating obvious :)
StellaStarfish Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2013  Student General Artist
Good God, i went searching for this poem again because it still occasionally gets stuck in my head but after a while I'd forgotten the words... So i found it again, and holy CRAP this poem freaks me out hahaha...
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Bwahaha, I'm glad ye enjoyed it me friend ^^

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Victorian-Vintage Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013
Great poem!
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank you my dear friend :3

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
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