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January 1, 2013
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Practice Poem - Man in Cage:

When I was young I was taught that pain begets pain,
Anger and animosity, malice and cruelty;
So deeply inflicted, so lovingly gifted.
I tasted of its rotten core and dared to call it sweet.

But what do I have to show for it?
White hot scars that burn in my dreams.
Reminders of a fragmented bi-polar self;
Self inflicted propaganda, to reinforce the "truth".

Truth so lovingly fabricated by a weakness within,
So desperately crying out for vindication;
Openly denying all that might shed light upon me,
Seeking only the company of shades in shadows...

Within four walls I sleep in exile;
Quietly pretending that I am still sane,
Never noticing how it has all turned out;
Alone I remain the same...




Never reaching, never living; I am free within the cage




-Chen Yuan Wen, 1st January 2012
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Author's Comment:

Arrr me hearties,

T'night I decided t' release this practice piece I did. More as a way of promotin' meself now that it's close t' the release date of me e-book.

In any case this poem was me experiment with the concept of an 'abstract poem'. That is t' say one that doesn't outright state its meaning and leaves you t' guess many things about it.

I can certainly say it was very difficult t' try and keep t' a concrete base idea while still keeping things relatively subtle. I doubt this could be considered anywhere near good but I suppose it wasn't bad fer a first practice run at the abstract stuff. I'm much more used to just splashing th' theme outright I suppose, rather than keepin' it hidden.

Also you might notice a kind of urban/spoken word feel t' this piece and if ye did, then yer right. I used slam as the basis for it ^^

Enjoy :3

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:

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2. Come like and post on my facebook page! - A lot of deviants don't know that I have a facebook page here: [link] :iconshockplz: However, if you are on facebook then feel free to come like the page and post comments. I love to reply to comments and though I'm lazy I do actually post stuff once in awhile ^^ (I'll try to be more frequent so like it please :iconpussinbootsplz:

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4. Buy an e-book :3 - COMING SOON! But really they're very cheap so if you have some spare change then give some to this hobo pirate please? Me throat can't make th' pirate accent without spare change yah? Well I can but y'know SPARE CHANGE is awesome :3

5. Like my work in general? - Come visit my gallery and see if there's anything else you like. Currently I only have one Lit. folder but I'll divide them properly later, for now here is the link: [link]
Add a Comment:
 
:iconweekendhunters:
Amazing! I like this poem. It captures precisely what we would usually feel whenever we take our revenge or inflict pain on someone, despite being taught that it is wrong and only adds to the chain of suffering, yet we do it, because deep inside, we actually enjoy it.

Furthermore, we would keep on trying to justify it, no matter how feeble, on why we did such a thing, just so that we could do it again. But deep inside, the feeling of guilt is still there, and it latches on to you even as you try to forget it or trying to justify it, but in the end, you must bear the scars of your own guilt.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
4 out of 5 deviants thought this was fair.

:iconmaj0rmaremolester:
You're right this poem couldn't be considered anywhere near good because that would be an understatement: This piece is simply amazing :D There really isn't anything to point out that needs improvement so I'll just get to the rating:

Vision - 5 stars because you stuck with the theme and the character's thoughts are shown very aesthetically where it is almost as if I am the one experiencing it all.

Originality - 5 starts because I have never seen any other piece nearly like this one; it really stands out as well as originality can.

Technique - 5 stars because you made it to be abstract and, although I may have an assumption of what the piece is about, I'm not really sure what the concrete idea behind this is and so it was executed very well.

Impact - 5 stars because everyone seems to think about it a good bit, myself included, and that is a very effective way to impact the reader; if we never thought about it it wouldn't stay with us after we clicked off of this page.

Perfect score all around and I hope to see more of this style from you soon ^^
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
7 out of 7 deviants thought this was fair.

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:iconpoetryfreak15:
poetryfreak15 Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2013
Very unique. Wonderful writing!
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Professional Writer
Aye me thanks friend :3

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconpoetryfreak15:
poetryfreak15 Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013
you're most welcome :)
Reply
:iconsircrashiii:
SirCrashIII Featured By Owner Jan 2, 2013
Wonderful piece!~
Thank you very much my friend!
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Professional Writer
Yer most welcome, twas just what was in my mind :3

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:icondarkzelda15:
DarkZelda15 Featured By Owner Jan 2, 2013  Student General Artist
For a practice poem, I believe this rather. I believe this is about revenge and hatred, how it made him feel better while all the while he became insane. This was very interesting, I can't wait to see other tries at abstract poetry.
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Professional Writer
huhuhu, we'll just have t' see what this pirate comes up with ^^

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:icondanceininfinity:
DanceInInfinity Featured By Owner Jan 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Interesting. I liked this poem a lot. Well done.
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank ye, I enjoyed the abstract style :3

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconneckbeardalmighty:
neckbeardalmighty Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2013
More angsty emo lyrics! Awesome.
Reply
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