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Literature Text
Practice Poem - D&D Tongue Twist:
So here, sit down, get down;
Everyone just f'in' hit the ground.
Cause I'm rhymin' with some rap I stole,
Everyone in the house just sit and roll;
Cause I'm burnin' fire with an Undead Monk
Yeah I play D&D when I'm f'in drunk.
Rush feats that'll make you go mad in black,
You'll scribble all over that fanny pack.
Now I'm crusin' through some Elven Wood,
Searchin' up some dude for the stolen good,
When a dragon pops out snarl and roar,
Man I roll for a 'Fist of Garandor'.
Eight dee six damage added through and through,
'Chain fist' makes me some Dragon Goo.
Got loot poppin' outta my character sheet;
Don't wanna get it stained with my milk and wheat...
So I sit in a tavern restin' up,
While the DM fills his restin' gut.
And his mom comes in the f'in room,
"Hey why didja enter mah lair of doom!"
"Do you want me to bring some pizza rolls?"
"Goddamit Mom I'm the Evil Grole!"
"But do you want some of those f'in pizza rolls?"
"Yeah I'll have some mom just make 'em gold..."
Man, this is why I love comin' over...
-Chen Yuan Wen, 9th January 2013
So here, sit down, get down;
Everyone just f'in' hit the ground.
Cause I'm rhymin' with some rap I stole,
Everyone in the house just sit and roll;
Cause I'm burnin' fire with an Undead Monk
Yeah I play D&D when I'm f'in drunk.
Rush feats that'll make you go mad in black,
You'll scribble all over that fanny pack.
Now I'm crusin' through some Elven Wood,
Searchin' up some dude for the stolen good,
When a dragon pops out snarl and roar,
Man I roll for a 'Fist of Garandor'.
Eight dee six damage added through and through,
'Chain fist' makes me some Dragon Goo.
Got loot poppin' outta my character sheet;
Don't wanna get it stained with my milk and wheat...
So I sit in a tavern restin' up,
While the DM fills his restin' gut.
And his mom comes in the f'in room,
"Hey why didja enter mah lair of doom!"
"Do you want me to bring some pizza rolls?"
"Goddamit Mom I'm the Evil Grole!"
"But do you want some of those f'in pizza rolls?"
"Yeah I'll have some mom just make 'em gold..."
Man, this is why I love comin' over...
-Chen Yuan Wen, 9th January 2013
Literature
Body Speak, Mouth Don't.
"I need a favour. You got a minute?"
No. No I don't.
My heart feels ripped out of my chest and trampled on too often.
My ears open to screams in the morning.
My eyes close crying every night.
My mind always turns dreams into nightmares.
My lungs contract too soon for me to catch my breath.
My worries far outweigh my years.
My brain feels overworked, overwrought, so tired.
My stomach cramps every night and I curl up in pain.
My knees weaken often but I'm still standing.
My mouth goes dry and I can't speak.
My hands dampen because I have too much to think about.
My bones feel weaker than they ever have before.
But I don't think it
Literature
Wicked Tongue
I will open my curtains tonight
Before I relinquish my bones to sleep
So I can rise and shine with the sun
At an incline that is not quite as steep
And I will plan my daily routine
So I am not required to interact
With anyone or with anything
Other than my path crossing black cat
I am the ghost of your former love
I am the spirit of your last best friend
Remember when I said I need you
Well I will not be needing you again
Never forget I am someone's brother
Never forget that I am someone's son
Remember this when you throw your stones
And you lash out with your wicked tongue
Literature
Frost
I am devouring chaos,
chasing it down with winter's chill.
Spare me your fingerprints,
summer's lovechild. Those knowing owl eyes
have me second guessing the wild churning
in my bones. You are the sleep that sweeps
my eyelashes, drowning me in my own daydreams.
When was it...
that you plastered yourself to my ribcage?
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Author's Comment:
HYAR HAR!
T'night I thought I'd show ye all this poem I did fer a bit o' practise ^^
It's about th' time I spent playin' D&D as a young lad. After that I went on t' neverwinter nights and PC version and never really bothered with pen and paper anymore.
Excuse me though if 'Fist of Garandor' and 'Chain Fist' are actual attacks I don't know their damage rolls and just picked them since they sounded like real attacks and made th' poem flow.
Enjoy this bit o' fun lads and lasses ^^
Happy gamin' :3
P.S. If ye want t' make th' DM's lines funnier, try rappin' em in an Eric Cartman voice :3
*Now that that's all done with, shameless pirate self-promotion time as usual*
Now then, as usual, if ye haven't checked out me e-book yet please do check it out. The link is up the top just click on the thumbnail o' the cover. It's only $1.99 and ye don't need an e-reader to read it :3. Thank ye all fer checkin' it out and remember t' like and share it ^^
-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates
If you really like me lots and want to show some epic support (other than just purchasing a book), following this link and read the journal (^_^)V >[link]<
If you'd like to support my artwork and you have some spare change. Please take a look at my new e-book:
Other Important Links:
My Facebook Page: [link]
Youtube Channel: [link]
My Gallery: [link]
Author's Comment:
HYAR HAR!
T'night I thought I'd show ye all this poem I did fer a bit o' practise ^^
It's about th' time I spent playin' D&D as a young lad. After that I went on t' neverwinter nights and PC version and never really bothered with pen and paper anymore.
Excuse me though if 'Fist of Garandor' and 'Chain Fist' are actual attacks I don't know their damage rolls and just picked them since they sounded like real attacks and made th' poem flow.
Enjoy this bit o' fun lads and lasses ^^
Happy gamin' :3
P.S. If ye want t' make th' DM's lines funnier, try rappin' em in an Eric Cartman voice :3
*Now that that's all done with, shameless pirate self-promotion time as usual*
Now then, as usual, if ye haven't checked out me e-book yet please do check it out. The link is up the top just click on the thumbnail o' the cover. It's only $1.99 and ye don't need an e-reader to read it :3. Thank ye all fer checkin' it out and remember t' like and share it ^^
-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates
If you really like me lots and want to show some epic support (other than just purchasing a book), following this link and read the journal (^_^)V >[link]<
© 2013 - 2024 WordOfChen
Comments52
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hahahah nice
undead monk eh ? i'd be an elven healer priest .... totally squishy and yet throughout the campaign (or the part of it i played) i never died but the hardy characters all died ... several times
undead monk eh ? i'd be an elven healer priest .... totally squishy and yet throughout the campaign (or the part of it i played) i never died but the hardy characters all died ... several times