Shop More Submit  Join Login
×

:iconwordofchen: More from WordOfChen


Featured in Collections

WordOfChen by angelgirlartist

WordOfChen by LugiaLuvr13

Text by jessicarabbit9519


More from deviantART



Details

Submitted on
January 10, 2013
File Size
1.8 KB
Link
Thumb

Stats

Views
6,666
Favourites
399 (who?)
Comments
91
×
Painted Skin:

He smiles at you, as you enter the office;
Wearing eyeliner made of contempt and disdain.
His cheap cologne invades your nostrils immediately
And you quickly suppress a cough.

"Yes, yes, indeed we have to review this...er, many things are involved."

His face is powdered with a layer of self-importance;
Lips reddened by the polite harshness he spews.
His forked tongue flickers as he prattles on
And you're really getting quite tired.

"Oh I'm sorry! Of course, of course I understand; but my way is much better!"

You're getting really bored now, so you take a look around the room.
The expectation is to see it bedecked with acolades;
Yet bare walls, cold and empty, are all that greets you.

"Are you listening to me, I'm telling you why this isn't good enough. LISTEN TO ME!"

You take a look at the cup of coffee you were offered,
Cheap and lukewarm; you narrow your eyes.

"Is there a problem? I'm being honest, this is for YOUR OWN GOOD!"

Funny, you seemed to be talking about yourself the whole time...

You take the lid off the cup and smile,
Seeing your own reflection looking so harried; you chuckle...

"YOU! HOW DARE YOU THROW THIS IN MY FACE, DON'T YOU KNOW I'M-"

Shut up...

You close the door to the office and walk out, hands in your pockets.
Looking up at the sky you feel calm and maybe a tad inspired.

Well then, what kind of story should I write today?





-Chen Yuan Wen, 10th January 2013
If you liked my work don't forget to click that favourite button at the top :star: (^_^)/ Thank you

If you'd like to support my artwork and you have some spare change. Please take a look at my new e-book:



Other Important Links:

My Facebook Page: [link]
Youtube Channel: [link]
My Gallery: [link]

Author's Comment:

Alright guys,

First up no pirate accent today, just because I want to talk in my normal voice for a little while.

The main issue that prompted me to write this was a particular critic who came by a couple of days ago. Now, I'm no stranger to receiving criticism; I get plenty. However most of you also know that I also don't accept critiques that deliver a low rating based on subjective reasons. This was covered in my deviation "The Good Critic's Guide", which can be found here: [link]

The problem that I had a few days ago though was this guy that came in with an officious attitude and of course I could see where he was coming from. So I checked up on his page to get a little background and then once I'd confirmed what I thought about him, I marked it unfair and sent him a polite reply explaining why I did not accept it.

So the dude gets angry and goes into the usual rant about me not being able to handle honesty blah di blah blah *insert pewdiepie voice* YOOOU DISGRAAACE and the worst thing is that despite claiming to be a 'professonal' and 'commercial' author; he starts swearing at me =_=.

EVEN more dishonourable than that was the fact that he doesn't give me a chance to reply. He just swears at me and then blocks me LOL. At this point I was thinking, dude grow a pair between your legs because that move just made you look like a eunuch. *Captain Jack Sparrow voice* "You're not a eunuch are you?"

Anyway, the point that I'm trying to make is this:

Be mature when an artist responds to your critique, especially if you tout the value: "Everyone has a right to an opinion". We are allowed to mark things as unfair and I personally leave the public to judge since it is available for viewing on BOTH our pages. The fact that you want me to accept honesty, but immediately go off at me when I reject your critique, is what really makes you look bad.

Doing a critique does not give you some kind of divine protection or right to spew nonsense. I'm the kind of guy that only practices what he preaches so if you preach something to me, then please cite examples (in your own work) where something has been proven to work. If you don't practice what you preach, then how are you any different from a lying politician? Telling me to do one thing while you do another. That's bad leadership right there.

Artists do check on the background of a critique and if we think you're pulling the wool on us, we will tell you off. I'm one of the politer artists in that respect because I fire warning shots (i.e. I will try to explain things to you first), if you continue to act in a belligerent manner afterward I have no qualms about naming and shaming you, because the lit. community doesn't need those sorts of critiques trying to put down people who are all rising up in their own way.

Remember, just because something doesn't gel with you, doesn't mean it's bad, we've all got our own style ^^

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:

P.S. If ya'll wanna support your boy then don't forget to buy my book, it's only $1.99 just a little more expensive than a can of soda people :3

If you really like me lots and want to show some epic support (other than just purchasing a book), following this link and read the journal (^_^)V >[link]<
Add a Comment:
 
:icontearsofblood22:
Critique by TearsOfBlood22 Jan 10, 2013, 8:20:19 AM
Very good very good you should write more stories like this.

My Opinion on this is that it is very awe inspiring and moving.

It shows many different emotions and can dipect the feeling of indifference.

This story should be published and read time and time again.

you truly have a way with words and can twist them to make the readers feel what ever you want them to feel, very well written.

Please keep up on your writing and perhaps even take up a career in literature, it could help you later.

as I've said very good job keep it up.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
28 out of 29 deviants thought this was fair.

:iconshadowyeclipse:
It's a nice small little piece that was an amusing read that just made me remember why I hate most publishers.

The imagery is exceptionally vivid, and the dialogue of the man helps you consider what the main character had probably done in response, though it is not explicitly written so in the story. You can easily tell that the character is bored and holds the man in the same contempt that the man holds for the character, and it didn't need to be written that the character clearly threw the manuscript, it was expressed well enough by the furious dialogue.

I also enjoyed the descriptions of the man himself, describing him in the most devilish, almost inhuman way possible, immediately turning him into a disliked character if it wasn't for his own actions and dialogue.

The main problem lies with how the piece ends. I thought it could have ended on a more punchy note, changed pace in a way now that the character was out of the dull influence the man provided. To me, the ending just feels... awkward, as well as some of the character's own thoughts.


In the end, it's far from the absolute best I've read, and has a few things that I don't really like about it, but the rhythm and the implication behind most of the descriptions are done really well. Just for me, the impact wasn't as strong due to the ending.

I'll be looking at this writer's other works, however. I really enjoy the style.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
1 out of 1 deviants thought this was fair.

The Artist has requested Critique on this Artwork

Please sign up or login to post a critique.

:iconpassionatepremise:
passionatepremise Featured By Owner Feb 13, 2013  Student General Artist
<3 I understand that everyone has the right to freedom of speech - but really, what you say is completely true.
(I'm currently learning more about Human Rights in Legal Studies).
*shakes head* It's rather much of a disgrace to see someone acting so obscene...shall I say, when faced with criticism in the face of it. Your works are brilliant, and I digress - I see no reason why people should treat you unfairly.
You're a wonderful person, in that you explain to people why you critic them, and perhaps why you do not appreciate their critic. Or even, just to answer them if they're being a tad unfair. Frankly, I'm not even quite sure as to what I'm saying right now, as Poets of the Fall are being blasted into the recesses of my ear drums, but never mind that.

I see no reason why they should dislike your work - and why they are being naive, (and swearing at you, no less).
... People these days...
*sighs* <3
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 15, 2013  Professional Writer
Agreed, that is how people are, but it's all quite fine. Such is the game of life and it remains quite a fun one at that :3

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconpassionatepremise:
passionatepremise Featured By Owner Feb 17, 2013  Student General Artist
:nod:
Ah, the game of life.
How we loathe it - but how we are also bound by its rules and regulations, no?
If things didn't exist, surely the game would be much easier - but it's just awesome like that, as difficult as it is. :XD:
Reply
:iconrenosgirl77:
RenosGirl77 Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Hah hah, fantastic!! XD I don't think I've ever read anything quite like this. Put simply: you are a genius, my friend. Keep up the awesomesauce work!! XD
Reply
:iconperianth5:
Perianth5 Featured By Owner Jan 17, 2013  Student General Artist
This is very good.
We all meet people like him in our lifetimes. The best thing to do is realise that they are just jealous.
Reply
:iconstrawberryvertigo:
StrawberryVertigo Featured By Owner Jan 16, 2013
Oh and also to add the guy in the poem sounds like a genuine self absorbed assholian
Reply
:iconstrawberryvertigo:
StrawberryVertigo Featured By Owner Jan 16, 2013
This kind of reminds me of an old story I wrote about a supervisor and an employee, its not perfect and its short but I felt like I wanted to write more about the two.[link]
Reply
:iconblackreddragon7:
BlackRedDragon7 Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Can't really say much except this is amazing... Do you think it'd be alright if I studied your works to try and find inspiration and some sort of style related or branched from your own? I really am not skilled in the poetry department ^^;
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013  Professional Writer
Yer most welcome t' do that. I'm doing th' same meself. right now I've gone back t' basics in rapping t' try and see what it might yield me ^^

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconsuperchefnick:
SUPERCHEFNICK Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Nice piece you have here, it made me laugh at the end :D
Reply
Add a Comment: