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WordOfChen by FoxofEbony

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January 23, 2013
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I've Changed (Yeah right):

You know, I tell myself everday,
That I'm going to change - that I'll be different.
'This isn't the same; I'm not the same,' that's what I tell myself...
As I sit in front of the computer, praying time doesn't move.

Coward, you're weak and you'll always be weak! You bloody disgrace...

I pick up some new magazine, get inspired,
'I want to be like that guy,' is what I think to myself.
I give it a try for two or three days - I quit.
Same old shit again...

Making up excuses? It's what you always do, you gutless wonder...

I try to reach out with my hands,
Seeking something, anything that I can find to help myself hold on...
But I don't find it - I just find myself,
Sinking back down into the same black swamp - I'm drowning.

Awww, what's the matter? You gonna cry, you gonna cry?

Yeah, I've hit rock bottom,
And you know what? It feels pretty damn good down here.
Nice, warm, comfortable, familiar.
No pressure, no problems - just like everbody else.
...But, I don't want to be like everybody else

Are you trying to catch up to me? What's the point, you're going to fail!

I probably am - I know I've tasted it enough times to believe that.
But still, I'm running till I can't breathe; working till my legs drop.
I'm moving my body, dancing on a stage of glass and nails;
It hurts and I want to quit, but somehow I don't.

You think you're going to beat me - you can't, I'm the best!

Yeah, you are the best, you're perfect.
You're the ideal, the goal, the limit, the sky.
But you're wrong about me beating you though; I know I won't.

Because all I'm going to do is surpass you
And I'll make sure that I just keep on climbing higher
And until the day that my heart stops beating,
I know, I can't quit anymore...

Why? Because I've changed.




-Chen Yuan Wen, 23rd January 2013
Alright mates,

Your Captain is back after another long break (though this one was unintended). I wrote this piece for my 'Again and Again' prompt that I issued in :iconblack-fedora-pirates:

I was going to do a piece on bad romance, but it was weak and so I crushed it. Instead I chose to write about something I've struggled with time and again: "The saying that I'll change or that things will be different"

I'm sure you've all said it yourselves, you'll do better next time etc. But the question is, when do you really change. I think that I've only managed to do so recently, taking proper control over my diet and exercise regime. It's tough, but it can be done ^^

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:

If you like my work and want to support me. Come buy my e-book for $1.99. I promise an epic fantasy you won't forget:



Want to stalk me? Here are some cool links:

My Facebook Page: [link]
Youtube Channel: [link]
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Want to sell your soul to me? Join up with my pirate crew:

:iconblack-fedora-pirates:
Add a Comment:
 
:iconmy-world-is-silent:
This is really good and it also is basically my life in poem form. I can really understand the person and it's amazing to see how things are seen through your eyes. There is a lot of passion in this which makes me think you're going through something like this, I do hope I'm right and not making a fool of myself. Although I am glad that I'm not the only person who does this.
This piece seems to be cold and angry at so many things... I like writings like this, the ones that dig into your heart and stay there.
All in all, this is a very good piece.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
27 out of 33 deviants thought this was fair.

The Artist has requested Critique on this Artwork

Please sign up or login to post a critique.

:icona7xfan666:
A7XFan666 Featured By Owner Apr 4, 2013
Wow you can really feel the raw emotion in this :3 Nice job :omfg:
Reply
:iconmariam-free-spirit:
mariam-free-spirit Featured By Owner Feb 16, 2013
really good ! it touched my heart and came at the time i needed it ! IT'S SO HONEST and hat's what make it beautiful , God bless you .
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank you, I'm glad that you enjoyed it ^^ Walk with the light as well :3

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconadrian-moisa:
adrian-moisa Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I really like the way you put in words what has bothered me for a long time. I finally managed to pull out of it by really trying hard to change.

A journal could definitely help anybody struggling trough this kind of life by being a friendly reminder wich you could not hate because you defininitly know he (you) is not trying to boss you. Also a journal is a way to give a stronger voice to the inner personna that is organized and dutifull and a better weapon at duelling the lazy part of you.

Regards!
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank ye fer enjoyin' it ^^

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconcabres:
Cabres Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013
A damned good piece of work, here. I read something along these lines, before. Or, maybe I am just having another alert case of deja vu(not jesting, being truthful). Whichever one it is, I'm thankful for you posting it here.

Adding it to my Favs, Captain. Aye, aye.
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank ye fer enjoyin' it, I hope t' come up with more that'll impress ya ^^

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconcabres:
Cabres Featured By Owner Feb 6, 2013
I'm far more than sure that such will be the case. You're a great writer.
Reply
:iconthetargfairy:
TheTargFairy Featured By Owner Jan 30, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I love this!
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Me thanks fer enjoyin' it ^^

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:icontbcevo:
tbcevo Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2013  Professional Photographer
Wonderful
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank ye kindly fer enjoyin' this piece ^^

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconeplex3:
eplex3 Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
wow, this is amazing.. I can really relate :)
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank ye fer enjoyin' this piece ^^

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconeplex3:
eplex3 Featured By Owner Feb 10, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Hehe ^^ np
Reply
:iconmaddielolxd:
maddielolxd Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Maybe You Should read the Seven Habits of Highly Effective Teens. Change yourself by changing your attitude and habits.
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Well, change is a slow process is it not? ^^

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:icondolphinbuster:
DolphinBuster Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I don't know what I should say...but,

Magnificent.
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Me thanks ^^ Glad ye liked it

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconcandyheartsweetness:
CandyHeartSweetness Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2013  Student General Artist
I can totally relate. ;( ... But, I don't have a choice when it comes to being different.
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Aye, it can be tough >3<

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconcandyheartsweetness:
CandyHeartSweetness Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Student General Artist
No kidding.
Reply
:iconvinnie-the-dragon:
Vinnie-the-Dragon Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2013
Are you emo?
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Not especially :3

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:icondaikaijuu-san:
Daikaijuu-san Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2013
You took the words right out of my mind.
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Glad t' have done so ^^

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconshocker7776:
Shocker7776 Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I love it. This is me talking to....well, me. In my mind, there is this voice, like a voice of reason, yet it exists only to put me down and make me feel bad. Really, it's not a voice in my head. It's just me trying to stop myself from getting a big head, but really, it goes too far sometimes. But I love this piece!!!!
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Aye, I can understand that >3<

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:icondarknessrequiems:
DarknessRequiems Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
i don't know who you're talking about in your text, some bullies i guess? and the bulled people?


i wanted to change, and ichanged; now i am hanging with cool persons and i dress myself well and compagny .u. i like myself like that. i am happy with myself
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Not quite, the poem itself is more of an inner struggle, but anyone can interpret anything ^^

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconmoodyhue:
Moodyhue Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I related to this. I'm surprised and a little relieved, that maybe someone else can put how I feel into words then maybe I'm not the only one whose like that? Wanting so much, and just being stuck and not fighting it.
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Professional Writer
That's why we try to realise it and fight it all the way ^^

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconmoodyhue:
Moodyhue Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Heck yes.
Reply
:iconfrumpysnuffleupigus:
frumpysnuffleupigus Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I can really relate to this one! Thank you! ^-^
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Aye :3

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconaluckystar:
aluckystar Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013
So I was randomly scrolling down the comments section, and I must say that you stand up to critism quite well.
I respect you quite a bit for this. :)
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Professional Writer
When you're a pro you'll get it heaped on ya. Nothing else to it, but to take it ^^

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconnoorelven:
noorelven Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013
good self pep talk :D
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Agreed eh? :3

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconnoorelven:
noorelven Featured By Owner Feb 6, 2013
yup :D
Reply
:icontripphippiiee:
TrippHippiiee Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Aaaaaaah I love this <3
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank you very much for enjoying my work ^^ Don't forget to check out my booook :3

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:icondanielleminer:
DanielleMiner Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
You have been featured in the :iconaus-art: weekly journal [link]
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013  Professional Writer
Wow! Thank you so much, that's the second feature I've had this year from your group. Seems 2013 is going off nicely for me ^^

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconsumarlegur:
sumarlegur Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I cannot understand why these poems get so much attention. I mean yeah, they're mostly kids or teenagers, but god damn.
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2013  Professional Writer
Well for one thing it's in english, hence it has a wider reach. Second, there's nothing wrong with writing something that can resonate with a lot of people. How good your art is doesn't matter if it's not getting to people's heart.

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconsumarlegur:
sumarlegur Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
That's fair. It just doesn't do anything for me.
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013  Professional Writer
That's cool ^^ I mean I can't hit everyone's individual taste right? You'll be better off going to the high-end lit. clubs like literature elite and other places to find something with more kick for you. What's on the front will just be what pleases the masses and that's my arena ;3

-Captain Chen of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
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