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WordOfChen by LugiaLuvr13

Literature by BlackRoseMaidenVI

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Submitted on
January 6, 2013
File Size
1.6 KB


17,161 (4 today)
1,195 (who?)
I Know You Hate Me Now But...:

Just give me a chance alright, I'll explain

To me, you're the girl that I notice everything about.

The way you laugh, the way you smile;

We got along great back then, even if we don't now.

And to be honest, I miss that...

You had the most lovely silky smooth hair

You'd give me the cutest anime girl smile

I wish I'd talked to you more about Manga,

Hell you got me started on the whole thing.

You were fantastic at drawing too

Man I was always jealous of that talent,

And I loved your drawings, like I once loved you.

I wish that you could have been a professional.

I would have bought your book every month y'know...

You encouraged me to write.

Back when my stories were shit,

Back when my poems were still baby's rhymes.

You taught me not to give in and I was grateful.

Now just let me finish alright?

I know that you won't speak to me.

That's okay, I admit to being an ass,

But the reason that I'm writing this poem to nobody,

Is because I want you to remember why I loved you;

I want you to recall that girl and think fondly of her,

Because once upon a time, I loved her the most...

-Chen Yuan Wen, 5th January 2012
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Author's Comment:

Arrr maties,

Now, everyone knows that Pirates have - though I do be afraid t' use th' term as such - swag and due t' this swag we do attract a lot of members of the opposite gender.

O' course, before some of us became pirates - well - we were bloody awkward tiny asian kids who were slightly on the chubby side with a bad haircut.

Thinkin' back t' those days I recalled a very bittersweet experience. That is what I sought t' put inta words and o' course the lingo fits th' time. The poem is best read in an URBAN accent, similar to that o' me urban teddy (click me youtube link if ye ain't seen 'em yet).

I admit, I should have been more mature about things with her, but I certainly have no regrets. Wherever she be, whatever she be doin' may the winds be at her back as they are at mine.

So tell me ye scurvy lot...what about yer tales o' romance eh? I'd love t' hear some.

*Now that that's all done with, shameless pirate self-promotion time*


Now then, as usual, if ye haven't checked out me e-book yet please do check it out. The link is up the top just click on the thumbnail o' the cover. It's only $1.99 and ye don't need an e-reader to read it :3. Thank ye all fer checkin' it out and remember t' like and share it ^^

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:

If you really like me lots and want to show some epic support (other than just purchasing a book), following this link and read the journal (^_^)V >[link]<
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As a lover of romantic-poetry, I must say, this is quite simple and bitter sweet. More sweet than bitter.

Not only the writing but the format too, with the italics highlighting the grouped paragraphs to let the reader know which paragraph belongs where, dispite all the lines being separate.

Upon reading it, the first impression one would get would be that of a love struck puppy or a smitten young boy. But it also gives the impression of innocence. Describing the things you loved about her such as her laugh and smile. It's cheezy, but romance IS the definition of cheezy.

Theres not much technique being used, but you some how managed to pull this confession off without the use of techniques. Its nice, but with the use of maybe repeats to make your statement more clear, or maybe the old fashioned rhyme would had to the quality (and entertainment), but thats just me.

However, you did use inclusive language; directing it to the girl without really using her name. And with the knowledge that she might never read this, and that this was just a way to express how you feel in the slightest hope of her reading this its makes the piece all the more bitter sweet. The un-read letter.

The litterature is that of a boy in love (or was), and it is obiviously honest, but I can't truely see it from being straight from your heart.

The part of "You'd give me the cutest anime girl smile." The part of compairing her to anime can go both ways. As a compliment, saying that she is as cute as an anime is a compliment but personally, (or for other girls) I think being compaired to an anime girl would not be fair. I would like it, but I think being compaired to a flower or rose would be more... romantic. It's not original, but every girl would like that to happen to them. (I like anime as much as the next otaku, but thats not the point) The point is, as much as it would be a compliment, it would also be too fantasy related.
But that was probably to help get on the subject of the reason why you love manga.

It is simple, because... I can't find much deep issues in the text such the void that she left and how much her missing presence affects you. In the text all I can see is the vision of a lost love.

But it is nice know that guys would still care and write for some they have lost. I'll say it once, and I'll say it again, its very bitterly sweet.

NOTE; nothing related, but the writers note made me giggle with the sterotypical image. Nice work sir.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
16 out of 17 deviants thought this was fair.

Wow. When I saw the title of this deviation, I thought: Hang about! This looks familiar... One click away and the memories came flooding back. This scenario you talk about is almost identical to my own experiences that I've had with a boy, and where we are now, which kinda helped me to empathize a bit. But enough about my own sob story;

The words you used here are simple, painting a story which is visually clear and easy to understand; telling the story of a boy admitting his wrongs to a girl of his past. I, as a reader, could also get a feeling of how you (as a writer) may have felt whilst writing this poem; sincerity (and maybe some sense of loss and regret). Also, it's straight to the point and doesn't drag on like I've seen some poems do, which was also a bonus.

The title also lured you in as well, making you wonder what else would be said in this poem. Also, it may change some girls perceptions of boys (i.e. boys being immature etc...instead of caring etc...)...No offense too boys out there...^^;

It is an extremely touching poem from a boy, definitely worth all the praise it and it's author can get. Simply sweet, heartfelt and romantic (without the cheese). :giggle:
Well done!! :D And keep up the great work! :typerhappy::judge::clap:
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
42 out of 48 deviants thought this was fair.

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Tyrison Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2013  Student Writer
Hello!  I've used the title of your lovely piece in a poem here for this :iconthetitlepage: project. Thank you for the inspiring art!
BiscuitEdi Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Quite well written. Original, the technique is lovely and the way you added "Now just let me finish alright?" at the end. Made quite an impact on me and as a writer at the point when "my stories are shit" this kind of poems inspire me to strive with hope that I will write something like this myself.
Best of luck to you mate and thank you.
ZOMBlEBOY Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013
    I love this poem because It exactly describes a relationship with my ex girlfriend and I.
    I know she hates my guts but I still love her.
Shinigami-Master Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Cant. Hold. Back. Tears...
stydja-dauthleikr Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
This is great...just, really really well written.
Lucy-DaKittyKatDevil Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Wow. I'm crying. I feel like I can relate to this poem a lot. The person I deeply love has recently been being ridiculous, so when I read this, it was like I was reading it from him. Wishful thinking, that's for sure.
noorelven Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013
bittersweet memories :D
fayeXsilo Featured By Owner Jan 22, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
When I first read this I thought you were an old friend of mine. He used to speak in the exact same way, write in the exact same way, and I definitely hate him now.

Sorry I had you confused.
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