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Graduation Day:


They told us we would be alright...

We had fought with honour and won our titles.

We had overcome trials together -

Watching dozens of our siblings fall in the line of duty.

For this they had promised us, a wondrous welcome;

A bountiful world of adventure, with a myriad of paths.

All this, they said, awaited us in the stone cities.

Large metropolises, where the working folk resided...

There were hundreds of us, who made that journey.

Walking miles across the scorching desert,

Clinging to a hope of the fortunes beyond.

Yet what awaited us was not a promised land -

Nor was it a life based on the merit we had earned...

Instead we found ourselves quarantined,

Pitching tents of inexperience-

Huddling together for comfort and warmth;

As the great gates of employment stood eerily silent.




-Chen Yuan Wen, 18 June 2013
If ye enjoyed it, don't forget t' fave it (^_^)/ Each fave is a vote fer popularity :3

I would also really appreciate facebook shares of my poem (^3^)/

Author's Comment:

Aye maties,

This be me latest release, dealin' with the troubles of unemployment amongst the youth who are graduatin' from university. (myself included xD)

Sadly, that is how the current system is .3. Please enjoy it fer th' time being

As always ye can buy me audio reading fer just 20 points by clicking on the premium download (and I'm readin' it's in me somewhat scottish-pirate accent, I doubt it be perfect but it is pretty funny to listen t'). Each click helps me earn twenty cents, so think of it like a donation o' spare change fer this poetic hobo pirate x3

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:

P.S. I'm BACK ye scurvy lot *3*

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Add a Comment:
 
:icononepurpleshoe:
As a semi-recent graduate and apprentice teacher who has already been laid off once and have as of yet found a stable opening in my field, I find this poem deeply meaningful. The metaphor of the adult world as a mythical promised land is quite accurate. This poem highlights the almost religious quality that the educational system has taken on: people suspect it is flawed when they are within it, but they are too afraid to escape it in case heaven is real. I enjoy the image the reader is left with of millions of the inexperience shanty town building up outside of the gates of employment.

The only part of this poem I don't care for is the line about siblings falling in the line of duty. Does this refer to those who have dropped out or students who have literally died along the way? Maybe older siblings or friends who had already fallen into debt due to lack of employment? I would have liked more clarification.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
13 out of 14 deviants thought this was fair.

:iconchiantiarts:
This is very beautiful. Yet, very heartbreaking.
Because the world is cruel as we see it when we are out of school for good. We have to face debt, money, taxes, and others more. And we have no time for love and freedom nowadays. And even now, many of us are struggling to get what we always dreamed of.
But sometimes, there may be hope in all of us.
This is what I see in the poem. And this is the type that shows what happens in real life. As I said, this is the most beautiful poem. Ever. :D
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
19 out of 23 deviants thought this was fair.

The Artist has requested Critique on this Artwork

Please sign up or login to post a critique.

:iconfableweaver55:
fableweaver55 Featured By Owner Feb 10, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
Hello Chen! Your work has been featured here: fableweaver55.deviantart.com/j…
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Feb 10, 2015  Professional Writer
Thank you so kindly for the feature ^^

-Your boy, Chennie :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconfableweaver55:
fableweaver55 Featured By Owner Feb 10, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
No problem :)
Reply
:iconalmostmyself:
AlmostMyself Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Great metaphor!
Reply
:icongizmoarena:
gizmoarena Featured By Owner Jul 11, 2013
great
[link]
Reply
:icongraveyardancing45:
graveyardancing45 Featured By Owner Jun 22, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
Once again, I am left speechless. Beautiful
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank ye kindly ^^

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconzephyras-lied:
Zephyras-Lied Featured By Owner Jun 22, 2013  Student General Artist
Glad to see you back! I wish I could've said this earlier, but I was on vacation. The imagery of them poem truly is amazing. While some may find jobs easily, it'll take blood, sweat, and tears for many others. Beautiful work, and I wish you good luck in finding a job!
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Glad t' have ye back and enjoyin' me works lass :3

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconenemv33:
Enemv33 Featured By Owner Jun 22, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
yut! Seems legit. In two years i'll be in a similar situation. Good luck with ye endeavors, Captain!
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2013  Professional Writer
Aye, prepare yerself fer it if ye can ^^ We'll all be weatherin' this storm.

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconhermafrodite:
hermafrodite Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
lol life is never perfict
im constinitly disapointed in life myself
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
Ah well, all ye can do is suit up and join me fer a run. That's what I recommend t' everybody x3

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconsmokedragon:
smokedragon Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013
First off, welcome back :D Secondly, I definitely feel that pinch regarding employment, myself. I've had to change trades a couple times now to find work, and it looks like I'll have to add a little more school on top of what I already have for anyone to notice me. Especially if I ever hope to get out of retail (which I was laid off from) and into a real job. Thanks for finding a good way to express how I've felt the last few years. This captures it perfectly. I do hope you have better luck than I have had.
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
Best o' luck to ye lass. Least ye have work experience, sometimes they don't even count what I've done here in the lit. community. Why bother joinin' a school club when I can contribute t' th' world. Ah well, th' frustrations o' life x3

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconscorpionmonkey:
scorpionmonkey Featured By Owner Jun 20, 2013
awsome....this is a great way to illustrate the frustrations my self and so many others have after college life, if your interested check out a song called "go forth and die" by dethklok
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
Bwahaha I am familiar with the kloks of death. Murmaider is one of my favourite songs xD That said, I'm glad ye enjoyed it ^^

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconaurora-celest:
aurora-celest Featured By Owner Jun 20, 2013
Thank you for sharing this with us. It really illustrates the fears and trials of this generation's young adults.
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
I know all the graduates everywhere are feelin' it, so I'm glad t' share ^^

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconmisskaythelareveuse:
MissKaytheLaReveuse Featured By Owner Jun 20, 2013  Student Filmographer
Brilliant! :)
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank ye fer readin' it ^^

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconmisskaythelareveuse:
MissKaytheLaReveuse Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Student Filmographer
Its a pleasure!
Reply
:iconjuliastrand:
JuliaStrand Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I can definitely relate to this haha
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
Glad ye enjoyed it ^^

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:icontwofacejudgeofarkham:
I just graduated today...they fill your head with lies...they say this world can be forgiving...that this world isn't dark and cruel...nothing but spreading false hope and courage for the future....and my classmates gobble it all up like the brainwashed fools they are...anyways great poem thanks for posting!! :D
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
Bwahaha, well ye can't blame anyone fer believin' it, then again we can't sit and do nothin' either. This be the middle ground I suppose ^^

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconnanamikobayashi:
NanamiKobayashi Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2013  Hobbyist
I graduated today and I don't know if I should be happy that I finished school or if I should be scared of the future. On the one hand I mastered a great step in my life and on the other hand are the real challenges still waiting for me...
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
Aye, aye .3.

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconfableweaver55:
fableweaver55 Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I don't normally read poetry but l can relate to that :) I recently wrote a short story titled The Corridor of Broken Dreams, which is about early adult life after graduation.

If you're interested, you can check it out here: [link]
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
I'm glad ye enjoyed this poem ^^

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconrunswithbooks:
RunsWithBooks Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2013
I love the "accent" you have in your notes. :-P I feel like you could play with the formatting a bit of the text, see if you could make it into one of those like... word art poems. I feel like this one in particular would be a good host for a bit of a scattered approach.

I love the poem itself though... I'm a recent college graduate as well, haven't started job hunting just yet (moving first) but I imagine it isn't going to be the most fun thing I have ever done.
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
Haha, I generally don't like t' do word art when I write me poems. Reason bein' that my style makes use of bolds and italics as opposed to structurin' a poem in a certain way. Making it more like word-art can make it more 'artistic', but I find I lose reach and understandability amongst the wider audience ^^

Thank ye fer readin' and enjoyin' it my friend :3

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:icontonycreatah:
tonycreatah Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2013  Student
I'm in a similar position, but I haven't finished school yet.
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
Haha then yer lucky mate ^^

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:icontonycreatah:
tonycreatah Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Student
Really? I'm still applying for places.
Reply
:iconsilviamarti:
SilviaMarti Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Very nice :)
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank ye :3

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconsilviamarti:
SilviaMarti Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Welcome cap :D
Reply
:iconyoshidude31:
yoshidude31 Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2013
Well, crap. Now I remember why I'm so afraid to graduate o_o
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
Aye, it seemed like I couldn't wait t' do so at one point, now I feel like I want t' stay longer xD

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconlambaskis:
Lambaskis Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
i like;p
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank ye :3

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconzurivapanda:
zurivapanda Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
so true...
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
Aye :c

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconlawapawa:
LAWAPAWA Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I love how you put the drama into graduation!!! B the way I dont need the vote for popularity! :)
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
Bwahaha, every story is better with a little bit o' fantasy ^^

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconlawapawa:
LAWAPAWA Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
thats true! :D
Reply
:iconericktuck:
ericktuck Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Actually it sounds more like Military Graduation... Especially when pertaining to fallen siblings, and fighting for titles, and honor's... So, actually ye need to rethink yer troubles there, man... If you think its rough out here, try actually being in the boots of a Soldier, and truly enduring hardships at home while being paid under minimum wage for all the many hours, weeks, days, and years of service to the United States Military, while being thousands of miles away from your loved ones that are dealing with said hardships... Putting your life on the line for this jacked-up government, which is nothing more than a modified dictatorship... This world was this jacked-up even before you went to your University and "earned" your titles... And I do not see it getting any better any time soon.... About the only stuff worth getting a degree for is actual specific job placement type certificate programs, for truck driving, police academy, mechanics, welding, etc... So count your blessing's cuz, it could be worse....
Reply
:iconwordofchen:
WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Professional Writer
I served in the military actually 2 years, I've completed full jungle training as well as several other courses including urban ops and combat signalling (was attached to an artillery unit). Point I'm makin' though is that the struggles are th' same, I was never comparin' it to any occupation really. Here, this is what most graduates from college feel and I was writin' about that. Could be worse, but it ain't better.

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
Reply
:iconericktuck:
ericktuck Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Certainly... This world is a mess...
Reply
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