Dependent on a White Pill:
Here I lie again tonight staring at the cracks in the ceiling
I'm afraid that I must bring to light these emotions that I am feeling...
Have you ever met a man like me: calm, composed and elegant?
Or are you one of the many dummies, living in a world that is decadent?
Oh I know how this society works, believe me I have suffered since birth!
I have always been treated as a worthless pariah, starting on June the first...
My fated birthday, a joyless occassion, the date of my inception into a world of naught
With a family that treated me, as a personal clone, I was no different from our dog named 'Spot'
For the first young years of my life however, I knew I was truly happy...
I learned because I wanted to and it seemed to please my Pappy
But as I grew, I learned of truth; a dark and dirty little secret
That I was merely an average student, 'NO!' my mother bleated.
Like a sheep that could not bear the thought she forced me into books and paper
I was made to learn from many tutors and my life dissolved into a empty vapor...
Friends were something nonexistent; at school I could not hear a thing
The latest items sounded alien and it hit me like sting!
I could not relate to anyone and I didn't want to at all
I found that they were all beneath me and so I built a wall
But then the shaking came at night and soon I couldn't stop
I tried every medicine that I knew but again it was all for naught!
In the end I turned to a special salvation, a little white taste of material 'Heaven'
It was a pill from a nameless bottle; The first in a set of seven...
Soon I began to feel as though I could achieve anything that I sought to do
My mind was focused for the first time in years and it was then and there I knew!
These pills were the solution to my ugly problem and with them I was complete
By consuming them each and every morning; I sailed upon my feet!
The day was a sparkle of vibrant colour and I was confident in any circumstance
No matter what the question or the problem; it crumbled away like an avalanche
I was happy now, as though a hole was filled and my heart it held an eager beat
But as the days wore on, I found that the joy was simply getting weak...
A single pill would do nothing for me and so I started to take one more
Before I knew it, I was eating three! Or maybe it was four?
I tried to stop so many times, but what you would know of my horrid life?
It is either I choose to take the pill or take to the blade of knife!
In the end you will tell me the very same thing, that this is harmful my body
You'll tell me that I should make some friends and go out and find a hobby...
But the truth in the world is never so simple, so shut your mouth and sit in silence!
I would rather swallow more than twenty pills, than resort to personal violence...
"I'm sorry Mother, but I'm just not your 'good' boy anymore..."
-Chen Yuan Wen, 21st June 2012