literature

Counting All the Voices

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Literature Text

Counting All The Voices:

How many voices choose to speak; a debate within my head.

       As I lie awake, counting cracks, on the wall above my bed.

I seem to think of random colours and things you've never seen.

       But I don't like to hear the ugly voices, some are rather mean!

Though I suppose we are a loving family and thus I must accept

       That when it comes to stashing bodies, we are most adept...
 



Best of luck detective, you have three days to find her (^_^)/




-Chen Yuan Wen, 8th February 2013
Aye maties,

Just thought I'd have a little mid-day fun with mental instability. Not exactly the best time for a release but MEH! I thought this was quite funny :3

A big thank you to all who favourited my previous work 'Undying', I'll have the thank you journal done shortly :3

Also, totally unrelated, but my new book '50 Little Glasses' is in progress, support me by buying stuff O3O do eeet naaao.

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Comments62
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TheVoiceOfCreation's avatar

I see. Well, the only way I would see a child-like eeriness to be relevant is if you gave some indication that the narrator was actually a child, unless you are trying to say that the narrator is child-like in nature- in which case, I didn't really gather that from the piece.

 

Maybe you could go into a little more detail with the piece or add a second section to it that might indicate a sort of game being played with the officers. That would give the narrator a more child-like appeal.